Sometimes I just want to curl up in bed

How is it possible that losing my Dad seemed so much worse than losing my Mom? Is it just that it's so final to have no more parents left? Was it more emotional because it was a military funeral? Did I somehow love my Dad more (or differently) than my Mom? Was it because my Dad seemed so much more "with it" than my poor mentally unstable mom and it was actually a relief to see her go? Am I destined to kill someone off every time I go on a cruise?

Note to my family and to anyone attending the funeral: when you saw the little box of ashes at the funeral, did you picture six guys hoisting that little, two-pound box on their shoulders or was it just me?

Thanks goes out to my friends who all came forward and took care of the girls (Laura and Kerri especially) surrounding all this. I actually left church a tad early yesterday, wanting to cry on Father's Day. I'm so happy for my Dad and for his reunion with his family, especially my Mom, but Father's Day this year was just yucky and despite celebrating my daughter's wonderful Father with them, I wanted to just curl up in bed all day. Kevin is a great, great Dad and an even better husband to me -- he drove almost 400 miles to attend the funeral with me -- a surprise because he needs to work and turned around and drove 400 miles home, alone to get up and go to work early. God bless you my dear.